Still Married...

One month anniversary this past Sunday. Still married. Still loving it. Still living in Bliss!

That's my boat in the background!

Adjusting to this being "married" is making me embarrassingly spacey, though. Thank goodness my friends are so forgiving!

 

After the ceremony, we literally
 sailed off into the sunset!

 It's the sorting things out.
 NOW what is important to me?
 NOW how do I balance the overload of things I need/want to do?
 NOW how do I set priorities?

Only just tonight was I finally able to get back into the studio and create beauty! My previous attempts this month were dismal failures, but tonight I was able to turn these ugly failures into something beautiful! 

The Wedding

I cherish this from dear Khadija

Rifaat and Suzanna
on their day

A STORY: Many people attend weddings but not everyone there is really "at the wedding" but if you stand at the door and listen, you can discern who was "really there." The first person exits, remarking to his friend, "What a great wedding; all of my friends were there." That person wasn't really at the wedding. A few minutes later a second guest exits remarking, "What a fabulous wedding. The food was incredible!" That person wasn't at the wedding, either. Finally, a third person walks through the door saying, "BARUCH HASHEM! Thank God those two got together!" THAT PERSON was really at the wedding. SO many times on your day I heard some version of the third guest's exclamation and I wholeheartedly agree! Thanks for including us all.
Love  & MORE LOVE,
Khadija

Creating THE DRESS--a Wedding Dress Dyed with Flowers

OK, so I can't sew. Will I let that stop me from creating my my own dress for the Ceremony? Well..... Only God is perfect, so....I'll give it a try. From scratch. Except for actually growing the silk worms and weaving the cloth.

I love silk charmeuse. It is so luxurious!
I ordered 4 yards of silk charmeuse from Dharma trading.
Found a pattern that looked simple yet flattering at the local thrift store.

Picked a bag of blue iris flowers, broke off the stems and any not blue part, and soaked them in cold water for a week.

Even after 2 stays in the dye pot, the charmeuse took up so
little of the dye, that it is more silvery than blue

The cloth arrived 12 days before the ceremony. Everyone is so excited about the ceremony! It is being called a wedding, even though Rifaat and I have decided not to register our relationship as a marriage with the state of Washington or to call it a marriage. You see, to "wed" is to be united; "marriage" is a legal term. I don't want to be "married".

I even get a bachlorette party! Sufi style, with semazens turning!

Oh, the dress.

Charmeuse doesn't take up the dye as readily as crepe de chine, so even after two times in the dye pot, the silk is just a silvery blue. Very nice, but so light it makes me look washed out.


It is now 8 days before the ceremony. It will be a Quaker/Sufi ceremony, with traditional Turkish music, the Lord's Prayer in Aramaic and in English, and Quaker style Silent Worship, out of which we will say our vows.

8 days.

The birds are so beautifully singing! And have the flowers ever been so lovely?

The Dress

I practiced sewing the facing on some left over Charmeuse, then tackled The Dress. Practiced painting the rose.

Practice

Painted a rose on the front using Colorhue dyes, which don't need steaming.
Painted over the rose with soy wax to protect the color.
Pinned the shoulders and sides together and dipped the dress in Jaquard Red Label Silk Dye, Royal Bue.

I used the Jaquard because I like the way it runs and seeps, and the blue is truer right away. The Colorhue blue looks purple until it is painted on the silk, so it's hard to judge what color you will get.

The Dress pieces still dripping after dipping in Royal Blue

To Wed or not to Wed? To Marry or not to Marry?

I don't need to be married. Bob left me in good financial shape. I am happy with my life.

Oh, wait, I was feeling a little lonely before I met Rifaat. It has been 8 years since Bob died. And there is something about being with Rifaat that transcends friendship. Something about the synergy of our core beliefs and energy.

But still. To marry?

So, I've spent the past several months looking into the whys and wherefores of being married. After talking with several lawyers, and--most importantly--with our own inner wisdom, Rifaat and I decided not to register our relationship as a marriage with the state. We want to keep our finances separate and to create a living, growing, life-long union not mired in the assumptions--sometimes unconscious--that marriage entails. I do not recommend this solution to everyone; being legally married to Bob was definitely the right choice at that time.

Some things we considered:
our ages and life expectancies
health insurance or lack of
social security -- how much each of us has invested
property -- each of us has a house promised to our heirs
debt responsibilities
current income projections
Our values and core beliefs
Our children and family needs

Tea and Coreopsis Dyes on Silk

tea dyed with itajime on left,
antiquie silk in coreopsis on right

Wonderful results!
I especially like the itajime (where I blocked the dye with ovals clamped onto the folded silk de
chine) dyed in tea.

I couldn't get the whites to show up in this photo. Please imagine the lightest colors are white.










The antique silk dyed in the coreopsis didn't show the itajime pattern as well, but what a wonderful effect I got accidentally from where the metal clamp touched the silk!

Natural Dyes: Tea and Coreopsis

Oh, man! I forgot to mordant the silk first! The colors won't be as deep, but hopefully, there will still be enough color to make a difference.

Suni's sister from Korea is visiting. She came over to do some dyeing with me this morning. I showed her how to measure the aluminum sulfate for mordant and to bring the water to a boil before adding the mordant and the cloth.

the tea from Yunan province in China
comes as a compacted disc

We soaked the silk de Chine and the antique Japanese silk in this water while we made a dye bath from tea from my trip to China in 2009  and from the coreopsis flowers I got from Laurel Boyajian.

silk in the tea bath
the tea leaves have been strained out

We folded the still wet cloth and clamped it with   plexiglass disks to block the dye. Then we submerged the cloth in the hot dye baths. We will leave it overnight and take it out tomorrow.

silk in the coreopsis bath

When I took Suni's sister back to the green houses where Suni works, Suni showed us some iris's we can try for dyeing tomorrow!


It was only after I got home that I realized I had forgotten to add the mordant to the boiling water before adding the cloth!

Tea Culture and Tea Bag Cocoons!

There's just something about a good cup of tea with a sweet friend! Even better when that friend's art is on the wall above you! Today Beth Reiter's tea bag cocoons grace the walls of the Vashon Tea Shop as we sip our tea and discuss promoting our art work. She tells me:

These small pieces of art were created using dried tea bags. Each was opened, cleaned, filled with cotton and a treasure, then sewn, and sealed with beeswax. They hold wishes for your good life and can be hung anywhere...in a kitchen nook, above the bed, in a window, on a rear view mirror.

Add your own wishes.

Kind of like a cocoon, they hold dreams and shapes of the future. Each cocoon is opaque so that you can sort of see what's inside, but not completely. A nod to the unknown. 

Every tea bag has the unique markings of its particular brew. Some have the rich, dark markings of chai and others are more subtle, like chamomile.

I had been saving tea bags for a while and didn't know what would become of them but I loved seeing the different patterns that emerged so I kept saving them and eventually they became cocoons. I hope you enjoy them!

They make great gifts for friends and family or for your very own self!

Beth is a Vashon Island artist who creates delightful shrines and other art  available on etsy.  If you would like one of her treasures, a custom shrine or tea bag cocoon, or have questions about her work, please contact her at this email: bethamay@gmail.com