I don't need to be married. Bob left me in good financial shape. I am happy with my life.
Oh, wait, I was feeling a little lonely before I met Rifaat. It has been 8 years since Bob died. And there is something about being with Rifaat that transcends friendship. Something about the synergy of our core beliefs and energy.
But still. To marry?
So, I've spent the past several months looking into the whys and wherefores of being married. After talking with several lawyers, and--most importantly--with our own inner wisdom, Rifaat and I decided not to register our relationship as a marriage with the state. We want to keep our finances separate and to create a living, growing, life-long union not mired in the assumptions--sometimes unconscious--that marriage entails. I do not recommend this solution to everyone; being legally married to Bob was definitely the right choice at that time.
Some things we considered:
our ages and life expectancies
health insurance or lack of
social security -- how much each of us has invested
property -- each of us has a house promised to our heirs
debt responsibilities
current income projections
Our values and core beliefs
Our children and family needs
Oh, wait, I was feeling a little lonely before I met Rifaat. It has been 8 years since Bob died. And there is something about being with Rifaat that transcends friendship. Something about the synergy of our core beliefs and energy.
But still. To marry?
So, I've spent the past several months looking into the whys and wherefores of being married. After talking with several lawyers, and--most importantly--with our own inner wisdom, Rifaat and I decided not to register our relationship as a marriage with the state. We want to keep our finances separate and to create a living, growing, life-long union not mired in the assumptions--sometimes unconscious--that marriage entails. I do not recommend this solution to everyone; being legally married to Bob was definitely the right choice at that time.
Some things we considered:
our ages and life expectancies
health insurance or lack of
social security -- how much each of us has invested
property -- each of us has a house promised to our heirs
debt responsibilities
current income projections
Our values and core beliefs
Our children and family needs
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